I agree with most of your assessments and these things are really hard to pick up during a test drive. After researching 10+ cars before deciding on the QX30 AWD Premium with all options, I came to the conclusion that no car ticks all the boxes. Every once in a while when I'm driving with someone in the rear seat, I think that I should have gotten a bigger car; my second choice was a Subaru Outback Limited. There are some things that would have made the Outback much better for longer drives, especially with a passenger sitting behind me. However, my QX30 is just so techy and modern. LED exterior lights, LED interior lights (my car has reading lamps in the back row, by the way), a very modern engine and transmission, and excellent driving dynamics.
2017 QX30 Premium AWD - Exterior: Black Obsidian - Interior: Graphite
Technology Package - Moonroof - LED Package - Navigation Package